As parent you have to teach children to be disciplined, treat others with kindness and also communicate their feeling without being disrespectful. You however cannot teach respect instantly as most prefer to deal with it there and then. Once a child is angry the thinking part of their brain is shut down and the become stressed. In such situation parents tend to become angry too but you have to understand that you cannot teach respect with disrespect, as much as you want to be respected in such a situation:
Don’t take it personally
It’s not easy to keep cool when your child has disrespected you but if you react with anger it send a wrong message. It seems impossible but it is good to take deep breath and relax before taking any decision. Do not let them see you mad. Instead of allowing yourself to feel hurt and angry be clear and direct with your child. Always tell them that their behavior is wrong and also know that you are in control and you need to set the limits. You are in charge and your child depends on you to the lead the way.
You should know that some and rude behavior is expected in your kids at some certain stages so you need to be prepared for it. Remember you don’t need to attend every fight or power struggle your children invite you to. Children tend to be more disrespectful if you haven’t sent the limits around their behavior. Once you have set a limit and it is disrespected do not enter into power struggle, let them realize they are wrong. Always draw a line on disrespectful behavior and let your kids know. Remember it is good to set limits when everyone calm than in the heat of the moment.
Avoid power struggle at all costs.
Once there is a power struggle and you keep it on then you have lost. Your job as a parent is to teach your child how to behave differently. As parents you tend to get mad with your kids and end up getting into heated arguments with them. The appropriate thing to do is prepare yourself so that in case it happens again you plan ahead so that you might decide to give a consequence for the behavior and then have a discussion afterwards. Your children have to get the message.
If you want things to be different you have to insist on it and not default. Its hard at first but you will like the change. Remember it is your job as parents to teach your children in a respectful way how to deal with problems. Be a good teacher and coach by teaching your kids respect and how to manage frustration. You coach them and encourage them when they get it right, and you set limits when they get it wrong.